I feel like this needs to be my motto…or maybe just my every day goal. I can’t seem to live in the moment or count my blessings like I should. Before I was married, I dreamed about who I’d marry, and what our wedding would be like. I met Charlie, the most amazing man there is, we had a gorgeous wedding, and then all I could dream about was what our family would look like. Then we found out we were pregnant with twins. My pregnancy seemed like the longest pregnancy ever. All I could do was dream about when the girls would finally arrive and our life as a family of 4. They were born and then I found myself wishing for the day they’d sleep through the night, or sit up on their own, or crawl.
What happened was, I didn’t enjoy each stage I was in, while I was in it, as much as I could have. So now I find myself remembering the days when I only had to worry about me, not a husband and 2 kids. I stare at pictures from when the girls were so new and tiny and find myself wishing I enjoyed those days (and nights) a little more. Not that I’d change anything for the world, I just look back and think about how much can change and how quickly it changes. But for some reason, I’m always looking toward the future. It’s not necessarily a bad thing to have future goals and plans, but it is a bad thing when you let it overshadow your present and not enjoy or live to the fullest in your every day, like I have been doing.
I’ve been doing this with my house as well, and I think a lot of people struggle with this. Sure we don’t live in our forever home, but I don’t want to wait until we are, to live. We’re always looking toward our next house, but I recently read a quote that really struck a chord with me, “compared to your last home, this is your next home.”
We’ve put a lot of time and love into this little 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom ranch, and will we get back every penny? Probably not, but I’m not focusing on that. We’ve made some amazing memories here already and as I look around, it screams us.
Charlie and I have been talking about moving and our next step for a while now. We’ve considered moving to a different area, staying in this area but in a different house, we’ve even talked about adding on to our existing house. All of these thoughts not only excite us, but they terrify us as well. Sometimes when you have an unsettling feeling, it’s God telling you to just wait.
We aren’t sure what God has in store for us or where He wants us to be, but we are sure that He’s telling us to be patient. He gave us each other at the exact right time in our lives, and He blessed us with amazing twin girls when we least expected it. He’s lined everything up for us the way it’s supposed to be, so we have absolutely no doubt that He has something amazing in store for us. I just need to work on being patient so I don’t miss out on everything on the way to where we’re going.
Why am I telling you all of this? Because this blog is read by some of my closest strangers and friends and you’ve kindly followed along and encouraged me through all of these stages in our lives, which I really appreciate. This too is one of those stages…